Let my people go...motherf**ker

At first blush (an adage I still don't quite understand the origins of), Variety's news that Peter Chernin's first acquisition at Fox Studios (hereafter F**ks Studios for reasons that, if they aren't already known to you, will be shortly) is a retelling of the story of Moses isn't all that interesting to those who don't have their ringtone set to "Let My People Go...to Funkytown." Ah, but then you get to the good part of the press release. See, the script is going to be written by Adam Cooper and Bill Collage, who wrote a retelling of "Moby Dick." I'll let the press release make the funny happen for you all on its own: "Moby Dick was pitched as a 300-like reimagining of the Melville story as a visually stunning action piece, and the story of Moses is conceived similarly. The goal is to give a Braveheart feel to a story most famously captured in Cecil B. DeMille's 1956 film The Ten Commandments." Yeah, you read that shit right...F**ks Studios is making a Moses movie in the vein of 300 and Braveheart.

Really? I mean...really?Don't get me wrong, the story is rich and interesting and hasn't been tackled in a while but...300? Does this mean Moses is thwarted by a special ed Humpty Dumpty? Where does the creepy Nine Inch Nails music fit in? File this one under unintentionally hilarious! Oh, F**ks Studio, is there nothing you can do passably right?