Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Oh yeah, well I WILL tell mom

Here's what's about to happen: Now that the thoroughly mediocre but harmless Karate Kid remake has taken all of the moneys, they're going to remake every flinging-flanging nostalgic family-esque movie whether they need to or not (Spoiler alert: not). Next up is...Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead. Yes, you heard me. Back when the film came out in 1991, a staggering 97% of audiences were males between the ages of 13-27 who just wanted to see Christina Applegate's cleavage, no matter how it happened. Somehow, I doubt they will recreate that phenomenon, unless they're smart enough to cast Rachel McAdams in the lead somehow. On the one hand, who cares if they remake this piece of crap? What are they going to do? Make it more piece of crappier? On the other...why do you remake a turd? Will it not, philosophically, remain a turd? What I'm really terrified by is Hollywood's copycat addiction. Even though this is not an 80s movie, as everyone seems to be remembering, it does suggest that mid-level nostalgia projects are back on the radar again now that the seed of Will Smith has spin-kicked his way into America's wallets. I knew that damn kung fu would end in no good. It's been quiet in the comments section for awhile now, so I look forward to someone's passionate defense of Don't Tell Mom the Babysitter's Dead as a brilliant film in its own right. Have at it.

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