Quick clips for Monday July 28

Box office, know thy master

Here's the estimated results of the weekend box office, which proves that I am blessed with only the most totally unusable and completely unimpressive talents.

1.) The Dark Knight - $75 million

As I ever-so-accurately predicted, this was the biggest 2nd weekend in the history of film, prompting many to conclude that The Batman's march to $300 million in 10 days signals a potential threat to Titanic's box office supremacy. It probably doesn't. $600 million is still quite a ways off and, although there aren't any major challenges ahead, the film could do amazing business and still come up $100 million short. If the film is sitting at $400 million within the next week to 10 days, it would be a more distinct possibility, but chances are things will start to die down soon. Or not. I'm very indecisive on Mondays.

2.) Step Brothers - $30 million

Okay, so I knew it would come in second and had it pegged at $25 million. This is because I figured friends would tell their friends how awful it was and not to see it. Turns out your friends hate you.

3.) Mamma Mia! - $17 million

Another 100% accurate prediction, Mamma Mia! has its eyes set on becoming the most successful movie musical ever. Right now, it has Hairspray slightly outpaced, but Hairspray still has John Travolta in a fat suit making out with Christopher Walken and even the power of ABBA may not be enough.

4.) X-Files: I Want to Believe - $10 million

Again, right placement (fourth) but I had it figured for another $5 million, which would have made it only a colossal flop instead of one of the single biggest flops of the year. Remember Speed Racer? This will do worse than that. How bad do you have to feel if you're unfavorably compared to a film with a monkey that causes epilepsy?

5.) Journey to the Center of the Earth - $9 million

I had a feeling this would place fifth above Hancock, although I was off a paltry $2 million. I guess the inflated 3D prices took it from the $7 million I predicted to the $9 million it did. Yeah, that's the ticket. If Brandon Fraser doesn't watch it, he could end up having the biggest summer of any movie star next to the Bat-people (when you factor in The Mummy 3: It's Rainin' Mummies)

Tune in next week when we see what kind of a challenge The Mummy 3 will be to Batman's claim to the box office throne. I'll leave the speculation of whether Batman could take down an undead Jet Li to those nerds who have algorithms for such things.

Hey, you know what would be fun? Another strike!

The Hollywood Reporter is...reporting on Hollywood...that is to say it details the latest struggles between the producers AMPTP (which is an acronym for callous douchebags) and the SAG (which is an acronym for overpaid whiny-babies). To be fair, the SAG does front little guys like bit actors and whatnot and the AMPTP is almost exclusively rich mothertruckers who poop $100 bills and eat caviar popsicles. Still, this is different than the strike between the writers and the AMPTP. See, the writers were unanimous, whereas the actors aren't. The rival actors union, AFTRA, struck a deal with the AMPTP already. The AFTRA/AMPTP legislation, hailed as a landmark by proponents of alphabet soup, seems to be good enough for most SAG members, to the point where some of them are attempting to overthrow their dark overseers. The reason you should pay attention to this is two-fold. Number one: Right now, there ain't a whole lot of new movies getting made. Fear of a strike is causing a holding pattern worse than O'Hare airport on "free airplane ride" day. Number two: TV shows haven't been affected...yet. If another big strike hits, it will cause another HUGE rift in the TV season, likely killing some shows outright. Since most of these shows are among my favorites, look for me to fly to California and help out with the negotiations. And by help out I mean call both sides dirty names until I've broken their will.

Sign of the apocalypse number 243: I'm looking forward to the Robocop sequel

MGM announced that Darren Aronofsky (The Fountain, Requiem for a Dream) will write and direct the next Robocop movie. This is the equivalent of the sadly deceased Stanley Kubrick helming the third Alien Vs Predator movie. I have no doubt in my mind that Aronofsky will find a way to do something cool with a premise that has been so thoroughly run into the ground, but I am at a total loss as to what this film will possibly look like. Given the bleak nature of his previous work, I imagine Robocop will attempt suicide somewhere in the first act and, by the film's end, will have discovered that life is impossibly cruel even for a half-robot half-man justice dispenser. I look forward to news that There Will Be Blood director Paul Thomas Anderson is directing the Thundercats movie.