Quick Clips for Tuesday October 28
Right one Let In
Not to sound like Stephen Colbert, but I am about to claim victory on a crusade I never really waged solely because I'm so happy with the results. You'll remember (or not, I don't know what you're on these days) back when I mentioned Let The Right One In...really, you don't remember? Huh, oh, whatabout if I told you it was the emotionally complex Swedish preteen vampire movie? Yeah, hard to confuse that with any other films out there, isn't it? You never hear someone say, "Was that the emotionally complex Swedish preteen vampire movie?" At any rate, although I promised to launch a campaign the likes of which has only been seen by things that actually need campaigns, the best it got for me was mentioning to Casey Logan at Film Streams that I really, really wanted it to come. Well, guess what (actually, if you haven't guessed by now, this page just looks like a bunch of letters dancing around for no reason)?! Yes, that's right, the end of November (more details coming in the future) will bring Sweden's bloodsuckers to Omaha for what can only be described as the single best thing that has ever happened to me past birth, the Bears superbowl win in January of 1986, and the banana cream pie Blizzard from DQ. All joking aside, as soon as I started to hear the buzz that was forming for this film (and the fact that a US studio is already planning a remake), I just figured that Film Streams would be all over it, because that's how they do: Bringing the best into Omaha. I'm just happy this time the best involves angst-ridden fang-laden adolescents.
Why I hate Jessica Alba
Hint: It has nothing to do with her looks. The ostensible reason for me crafting this post is the news that Alba is doing An Invisible Sign of Her Own, which is an awful title but allows for easy jokes about how she's still the invisible woman in Fantastic Four. The problem I have with Alba is that she doesn't try. Seriously, I can handle someone without talent, you see famous people who are little more than pretty all the time (throw a rock in a Hollywood hotspot and you'll find a half dozen...they'll be the ones trying to shield their faces from the rock by using others as human shields). The problem is, much as I hate people who are both stupid and lazy (theorizing you can be one or the other, but not both), Alba is untalented and never makes an effort, either through her career moves (her latest being a romantic comedy) by challenging herself to actually act or within the awful pictures she selects (she just stands there, unwilling to even attempt emoting). I know she's beautiful, but she may be the least watchable actress I have ever seen in my life. That may be extreme words and, save for a Tara Reid here or there, I think I can safely protect this position. What say you silent blog readers? Who among the beautiful do you loathe? (We're talking celebrities, I don't want to hear about that girl in high school who you still have a mad-on for decades later.)
When things go too far, you get this
I don't know whether to blame the success of High School Musical 3, the studios' reckless desire for as many remakes as can possibly be attempted, or that damn 6-degrees game, but Zac Efron is remaking Footloose. Sure, this isn't a tragedy on the "Kevin Costner is Citizen Kane" scale but have you ever, I mean ever, heard of a more pointless and awful remake? Not that it was relevant when it was made decades ago but in what part of the country are you going to set this "you kids can't dance here" movie? Seriously, I know that there's a Fame remake going, and I'm not all that okay with that development either, but it makes more sense than hearing that Tiger Beat boy is going to be rocking out and ruining Kevin Bacon's shining moment. Hey, he's out of work these days too....why not have him play the John Lithgow role and oh my God I've just revealed that I know a lot about Footloose. Um, it's because my sister really liked it and...no, I don't know why I owned the soundtrack, I'm sure it was because...hey look, is that something over there by which you can be distracted?
Not to sound like Stephen Colbert, but I am about to claim victory on a crusade I never really waged solely because I'm so happy with the results. You'll remember (or not, I don't know what you're on these days) back when I mentioned Let The Right One In...really, you don't remember? Huh, oh, whatabout if I told you it was the emotionally complex Swedish preteen vampire movie? Yeah, hard to confuse that with any other films out there, isn't it? You never hear someone say, "Was that the emotionally complex Swedish preteen vampire movie?" At any rate, although I promised to launch a campaign the likes of which has only been seen by things that actually need campaigns, the best it got for me was mentioning to Casey Logan at Film Streams that I really, really wanted it to come. Well, guess what (actually, if you haven't guessed by now, this page just looks like a bunch of letters dancing around for no reason)?! Yes, that's right, the end of November (more details coming in the future) will bring Sweden's bloodsuckers to Omaha for what can only be described as the single best thing that has ever happened to me past birth, the Bears superbowl win in January of 1986, and the banana cream pie Blizzard from DQ. All joking aside, as soon as I started to hear the buzz that was forming for this film (and the fact that a US studio is already planning a remake), I just figured that Film Streams would be all over it, because that's how they do: Bringing the best into Omaha. I'm just happy this time the best involves angst-ridden fang-laden adolescents.
Why I hate Jessica Alba
Hint: It has nothing to do with her looks. The ostensible reason for me crafting this post is the news that Alba is doing An Invisible Sign of Her Own, which is an awful title but allows for easy jokes about how she's still the invisible woman in Fantastic Four. The problem I have with Alba is that she doesn't try. Seriously, I can handle someone without talent, you see famous people who are little more than pretty all the time (throw a rock in a Hollywood hotspot and you'll find a half dozen...they'll be the ones trying to shield their faces from the rock by using others as human shields). The problem is, much as I hate people who are both stupid and lazy (theorizing you can be one or the other, but not both), Alba is untalented and never makes an effort, either through her career moves (her latest being a romantic comedy) by challenging herself to actually act or within the awful pictures she selects (she just stands there, unwilling to even attempt emoting). I know she's beautiful, but she may be the least watchable actress I have ever seen in my life. That may be extreme words and, save for a Tara Reid here or there, I think I can safely protect this position. What say you silent blog readers? Who among the beautiful do you loathe? (We're talking celebrities, I don't want to hear about that girl in high school who you still have a mad-on for decades later.)
When things go too far, you get this
I don't know whether to blame the success of High School Musical 3, the studios' reckless desire for as many remakes as can possibly be attempted, or that damn 6-degrees game, but Zac Efron is remaking Footloose. Sure, this isn't a tragedy on the "Kevin Costner is Citizen Kane" scale but have you ever, I mean ever, heard of a more pointless and awful remake? Not that it was relevant when it was made decades ago but in what part of the country are you going to set this "you kids can't dance here" movie? Seriously, I know that there's a Fame remake going, and I'm not all that okay with that development either, but it makes more sense than hearing that Tiger Beat boy is going to be rocking out and ruining Kevin Bacon's shining moment. Hey, he's out of work these days too....why not have him play the John Lithgow role and oh my God I've just revealed that I know a lot about Footloose. Um, it's because my sister really liked it and...no, I don't know why I owned the soundtrack, I'm sure it was because...hey look, is that something over there by which you can be distracted?
posted by Ryan at
6:43 AM
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