Quick clips for Tuesday February 17
Austen vs Austen vs Aliens vs Zombies
When I first heard that "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies" was going to be written, I was intrigued. As I have mentioned previously, I can find nothing wrong with Jane Austen's bland and overvalued writing that could not be improved with the consumption of a fair amount of human brains and flesh. That said, I did not realize at the time that we had entered into a "do crazy shit with Jane Austen novels" arms race. Variety is reporting that Elton John's film production company (the whosawhatsit now?) is fast-tracking Pride and Predator, in which the loving English characters must set aside terse flirtations and hand wringing when crazy aliens arrive. So, basically, it's a race to see who can be first to defile the memory of every snooty girl's favorite writer. Sadly, I think there's only room for one series here, and they should strike a bargain in which the survivors of the zombie apocalypse are able to find love...only to then be assaulted by evil aliens. The self-contained continuity would be epic. I would like to point out that, should either of these movies (A) happen and (B) make money, we will see a deluge of classic-novels-meet-crazy-bullshit movies happen. Picture Great Expectations...of Terror or The Old Man and the Sea Monster. You can do this all day. Oh, The Catcher in the Rye or Die Hard. Play at home.
This just twittered
For the record, I'm going to give credit to Slashfilm.com for this next tidbit and not the twitter from Production Weekly because (A) Slashfilm rules (it was just named one of the top 25 blogs by "Time Magazine"...I'm guessing we were 26th...next year dammit) and (B) I refuse to give credit to a twitter post. Apparently, Timur Bekmambetov (Wanted) is going to (potentially) direct Reese Witherspoon and Robert Downey Jr in The Days Before. In what can only be described as a melodramatic art film, the movie will tell the tale of aliens who attempt to destroy the human race by moving backward through time, wiping out humanity yesterday-to-yesterday, unless one man who is moving backward ahead of them can convince the world to stop them. Bekmambetov is known best for his Russian sci-fi/supernatural/WTF series Nightwatch and for Wanted, the most terrible film I've ever enjoyed. Witherspoon and Downey Jr will likely end up having some kind of romance, and I'll leave you to determine who gets the better of that deal. I will say, I like Downey Jr the movie star even more than Downey Jr the "actor." What I mean is, he has enough talent to be the douchey kind of "I only do serious work" type of guy, but instead he has fully embraced his post-Iron Man leading man-ness. This is great because we really don't have too many of these guys left, now that we've banished Tom Cruise and Mel Gibson to the island of misfit toys. Good on you, Bobby.
Producers of potential Johnny Quest movie unaware of "Venture Brothers"
I have no explanation for how you could make a Johnny Quest movie in a world where "The Venture Brothers" have turned him into a cracked-out psychopath. Seriously, that show (the latter, not the former) is one of the most inspired, hilarious television programs out there and I thought it killed any potential JQ movie. So much so that whoever it is that puts out the "best unproduced scripts" lists every year has had that one on for awhile now, because there was no way to make it when young people have come to know Johnny for his heroin addiction. This apparently isn't stopping Zac Effron and The Rock, who are angling to play Johnny and Race Bannon, respectively (although it would be funnier the other way around). Seeing as how Brock Samson is one of the, let's say, 10 best characters ever created and how we're all a little over the whole "cartoon-to-movie" shenanigans, why not let this one pass you by, guys? I mean, I get the appeal of an adventure movie (if National Treasure 2: Eff You Guys, We Can Slap Any Crap We Want In Here and Make Bank can happen, anything can), but why not strive to come up with new characters to put in those situations (I mean, besides the obvious "having to do extra thinking" stuff). I'm likely tilting at windmills here, as this has already made its way into The Rock's psyche, as he is the one "breaking" the news of his interest. In related news, "Ryan Syrek will be getting paid ludicrous amounts of money to do things." I want to see if we can make things happen through rumor mongering.
When I first heard that "Pride and Prejudice and Zombies" was going to be written, I was intrigued. As I have mentioned previously, I can find nothing wrong with Jane Austen's bland and overvalued writing that could not be improved with the consumption of a fair amount of human brains and flesh. That said, I did not realize at the time that we had entered into a "do crazy shit with Jane Austen novels" arms race. Variety is reporting that Elton John's film production company (the whosawhatsit now?) is fast-tracking Pride and Predator, in which the loving English characters must set aside terse flirtations and hand wringing when crazy aliens arrive. So, basically, it's a race to see who can be first to defile the memory of every snooty girl's favorite writer. Sadly, I think there's only room for one series here, and they should strike a bargain in which the survivors of the zombie apocalypse are able to find love...only to then be assaulted by evil aliens. The self-contained continuity would be epic. I would like to point out that, should either of these movies (A) happen and (B) make money, we will see a deluge of classic-novels-meet-crazy-bullshit movies happen. Picture Great Expectations...of Terror or The Old Man and the Sea Monster. You can do this all day. Oh, The Catcher in the Rye or Die Hard. Play at home.
This just twittered
For the record, I'm going to give credit to Slashfilm.com for this next tidbit and not the twitter from Production Weekly because (A) Slashfilm rules (it was just named one of the top 25 blogs by "Time Magazine"...I'm guessing we were 26th...next year dammit) and (B) I refuse to give credit to a twitter post. Apparently, Timur Bekmambetov (Wanted) is going to (potentially) direct Reese Witherspoon and Robert Downey Jr in The Days Before. In what can only be described as a melodramatic art film, the movie will tell the tale of aliens who attempt to destroy the human race by moving backward through time, wiping out humanity yesterday-to-yesterday, unless one man who is moving backward ahead of them can convince the world to stop them. Bekmambetov is known best for his Russian sci-fi/supernatural/WTF series Nightwatch and for Wanted, the most terrible film I've ever enjoyed. Witherspoon and Downey Jr will likely end up having some kind of romance, and I'll leave you to determine who gets the better of that deal. I will say, I like Downey Jr the movie star even more than Downey Jr the "actor." What I mean is, he has enough talent to be the douchey kind of "I only do serious work" type of guy, but instead he has fully embraced his post-Iron Man leading man-ness. This is great because we really don't have too many of these guys left, now that we've banished Tom Cruise and Mel Gibson to the island of misfit toys. Good on you, Bobby.
Producers of potential Johnny Quest movie unaware of "Venture Brothers"
I have no explanation for how you could make a Johnny Quest movie in a world where "The Venture Brothers" have turned him into a cracked-out psychopath. Seriously, that show (the latter, not the former) is one of the most inspired, hilarious television programs out there and I thought it killed any potential JQ movie. So much so that whoever it is that puts out the "best unproduced scripts" lists every year has had that one on for awhile now, because there was no way to make it when young people have come to know Johnny for his heroin addiction. This apparently isn't stopping Zac Effron and The Rock, who are angling to play Johnny and Race Bannon, respectively (although it would be funnier the other way around). Seeing as how Brock Samson is one of the, let's say, 10 best characters ever created and how we're all a little over the whole "cartoon-to-movie" shenanigans, why not let this one pass you by, guys? I mean, I get the appeal of an adventure movie (if National Treasure 2: Eff You Guys, We Can Slap Any Crap We Want In Here and Make Bank can happen, anything can), but why not strive to come up with new characters to put in those situations (I mean, besides the obvious "having to do extra thinking" stuff). I'm likely tilting at windmills here, as this has already made its way into The Rock's psyche, as he is the one "breaking" the news of his interest. In related news, "Ryan Syrek will be getting paid ludicrous amounts of money to do things." I want to see if we can make things happen through rumor mongering.
posted by Ryan at
9:20 AM
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