Quick clips for Thursday March 26
Nyuk, Nyuking to an Oscar?
Somebody please tell me how in the Sam Hell The Three Stooges biography, to be directed by guys best known for putting sperm in Cameron Diaz's hair, has two of the more outstanding actors of our generation? What the hell is going on here? If Variety is to be believed (and they have been filthy, filthy liars at times), Sean Penn is Larry, Benicio Del Toro is Moe, and Jim Carrey is Curly (he's going to gain the wait for the role...and unlike Russell Crowe, this actually seems warranted). So, we're living in a world where The Farrelly Brothers have managed to unite Del Toro and Penn in order to have them wail on each other's junk and stuff. Wowza. Well, look at it this way, Penn was bound to try and do something to make him seem like less of an assface soon, and Del Toro just got done being Che and probably needs something lighter. I guess the big question is: Will we care about this movie? I generally loathe biopics, but I did enjoy the Stooges back in the day. And by back in the day, I mean back when I went to drive-in theaters in the summers and watched their shorts before the movies. I guess my hesitation is that they're going to go all Vh1 Behind the Music on our ass and we're going to see Curly snorting lines of blow off of Larry's ridiculous hair. Actually, scrap my complaints, that's an actual recommendation. I want to see that. I need to see that. I'm going to go photoshop that into reality.
Ding dong, Mark Millar's pitch is dead
For those of you out there who still have some kind of chubby for seeing Superman on the big screen despite having said chubby stomped on by Superman IV and Superman Returns, you won't be seeing Mark Millar's version. Not that anyone besides Mark Millar thought that Warner Bros would go for Mark Millar's version (or that anyone beyond Mark Millar would want to see Mark Millar's version), even Mark Millar now admits that Mark Millar's version is now dead. This will allow Mark Millar to continue working on Mark Millar's comics, Mark Millar's video game adaptations, and Mark Millar's other movie projects, most of which are adaptations of Mark Millar comics of Mark Millar video games. Why WB didn't go for a Mark Millar idea following Superman from birth to death as the last man of both Earth AND Krypton is beyond Mark Millar's understanding, but likely has to do with it sounding insanely boring. In case you hadn't noticed, I'm trying to help Mark Millar out. See, he's actually quite a good writer, but he seems to be spending so much time self-promoting these days, that he's doing very little in the way of actual writing (Kick-Ass is now like so late that we may get the movie before the finale of the comic). So, I figured if I pumped his name out there like a billion times, he may be able to get back to what he's supposed to do, which is write (specifically, write things that don't suck). So, you hear me Mark Millar? Mark Millar? Mark Millar!
Lost Recap: Sayid goes with the gut
Last night's episode should have given me the special tinglies. I mean, it was a Sayid episode that heavily featured Sayid. That's giving me a delicious plate of food that also comes with money. And yet...meh. I mean, it was good at times, but it felt uneven. Worse yet, my favorite character did something (twice) he had never done before: He acted out of character. In other words, he was poorly written...twice. Oh, and as I called it, very little (until the end) actually happened. Mostly just flashbacks and chatter. To pause for a moment: Nobody expects more out of a show week-to-week than "Lost" fans. Be honest. We want new theories, dead bodies, engaging developments in EVERY episode. When they don't give those up, we freak out. Nobody can deliver more than 100 hours of consistent entertainment. The show has only had a handful of actual bad episodes (and only two terrible storylines). That's not a bad batting average. So, the fact that I'm bitching like a petulant high-schooler shouldn't indicate that the show is troubled. It rules. I just wasn't 100% sold on this episode. Here's why in the form of a recap:
1.) Sayid, still in cage, has a flashback showing him as a boy in Iraq killing a chicken. He's a killer, get it? Then we see him in a flashback with Ben after he got off the island supposedly killing Widmore's men because Ben convinced him to (did anybody else get a Memento vibe? Like Ben was Joe Pantoliono who was probably just having him kill people for fun?). We see Sayid in "present time" in 1977 in a cage still. He refuses to cooperate (because he can't on account of not actually being a "hostile"). Sawyer, who is showing some of his self-motivated issues (he WILL protect his life with Juliet at all costs), tries to convince him to escape at first, but he won't do it. So they take Sayid to the Dharma torture guy: Larry from "The Newhart Show." Hmmm
2.) Sayid gets drugged up and spills all the beans, which makes him sound loony. Now, my friend Ben (again, not the homicidal maniac) thought Sawyer was stupid for just standing there, but I don't know his alternative. All he could do is either let Sayid go or hope things went the way they did: that everyone would think Sayid was nuts. The Dharma gang takes a vote, they want to kill him. Sawyer sheepishly agrees, tries once more to get Sayid free (but he don't want to), then gives up.
3.) Little Ben lights a Dharma van on fire, distracts everyone, springs Sayid free. Sayid then shoots little Ben in the gut. Immediately after proclaiming "You're right about me, I am a killer" he shoots little Ben...IN THE GUT.
Okay, so you can see little happened. Plus, nobody thinks Ben is dead. Yes, this will have some kind of ripple effect and we can begin to see if you CAN change the future or if all of this was already incorporated in Ben's past (my vote is on that one). Jack will probably have to save little Ben (echoing his surgery on Ben in the future). Oh, I forgot to mention Kate is longing for Sawyer although apparently living with Jack?! I can't figure out what she actually feels. Maybe she can't either, but it's time for her to feel strongly one way or the other scriptwise. I think the shock of little Ben getting shot was blunted because we all saw it coming (and it won't stick). So, not a biggie at the end.
The bigger issue for me was Sayid acting dumb. Shoot him in the face. You're a killer. You snap dudes necks. You shoot him in the tummy? Dumb. I like the idea that the island won't let him kill Ben, but I would like to have seen that. He stands over little Ben, goes to pull the trigger and is somehow stopped. That would work. This was dumb. Plus, how the hell is Sayid going to get jumped by the prettier version of Anna Lucia? He's been in that position with a dangerous chick before, how is he going to let his guard down like that. Bullshit. It's just not right. I'm ready to get things moving here. Little bursts of story are okay, but I want to get driving to someplace more exciting.
Next week is going to be "save little Ben" episode. You know it. It will be cut with Ben in 2008, which is good because he's a great actor and should make the episode interesting...but it bears mentioning that we're entering the home stretch of the next-to-last season. It's okay to start heading forward now. So-so episode, I'd go with a C+.
Somebody please tell me how in the Sam Hell The Three Stooges biography, to be directed by guys best known for putting sperm in Cameron Diaz's hair, has two of the more outstanding actors of our generation? What the hell is going on here? If Variety is to be believed (and they have been filthy, filthy liars at times), Sean Penn is Larry, Benicio Del Toro is Moe, and Jim Carrey is Curly (he's going to gain the wait for the role...and unlike Russell Crowe, this actually seems warranted). So, we're living in a world where The Farrelly Brothers have managed to unite Del Toro and Penn in order to have them wail on each other's junk and stuff. Wowza. Well, look at it this way, Penn was bound to try and do something to make him seem like less of an assface soon, and Del Toro just got done being Che and probably needs something lighter. I guess the big question is: Will we care about this movie? I generally loathe biopics, but I did enjoy the Stooges back in the day. And by back in the day, I mean back when I went to drive-in theaters in the summers and watched their shorts before the movies. I guess my hesitation is that they're going to go all Vh1 Behind the Music on our ass and we're going to see Curly snorting lines of blow off of Larry's ridiculous hair. Actually, scrap my complaints, that's an actual recommendation. I want to see that. I need to see that. I'm going to go photoshop that into reality.
Ding dong, Mark Millar's pitch is dead
For those of you out there who still have some kind of chubby for seeing Superman on the big screen despite having said chubby stomped on by Superman IV and Superman Returns, you won't be seeing Mark Millar's version. Not that anyone besides Mark Millar thought that Warner Bros would go for Mark Millar's version (or that anyone beyond Mark Millar would want to see Mark Millar's version), even Mark Millar now admits that Mark Millar's version is now dead. This will allow Mark Millar to continue working on Mark Millar's comics, Mark Millar's video game adaptations, and Mark Millar's other movie projects, most of which are adaptations of Mark Millar comics of Mark Millar video games. Why WB didn't go for a Mark Millar idea following Superman from birth to death as the last man of both Earth AND Krypton is beyond Mark Millar's understanding, but likely has to do with it sounding insanely boring. In case you hadn't noticed, I'm trying to help Mark Millar out. See, he's actually quite a good writer, but he seems to be spending so much time self-promoting these days, that he's doing very little in the way of actual writing (Kick-Ass is now like so late that we may get the movie before the finale of the comic). So, I figured if I pumped his name out there like a billion times, he may be able to get back to what he's supposed to do, which is write (specifically, write things that don't suck). So, you hear me Mark Millar? Mark Millar? Mark Millar!
Lost Recap: Sayid goes with the gut
Last night's episode should have given me the special tinglies. I mean, it was a Sayid episode that heavily featured Sayid. That's giving me a delicious plate of food that also comes with money. And yet...meh. I mean, it was good at times, but it felt uneven. Worse yet, my favorite character did something (twice) he had never done before: He acted out of character. In other words, he was poorly written...twice. Oh, and as I called it, very little (until the end) actually happened. Mostly just flashbacks and chatter. To pause for a moment: Nobody expects more out of a show week-to-week than "Lost" fans. Be honest. We want new theories, dead bodies, engaging developments in EVERY episode. When they don't give those up, we freak out. Nobody can deliver more than 100 hours of consistent entertainment. The show has only had a handful of actual bad episodes (and only two terrible storylines). That's not a bad batting average. So, the fact that I'm bitching like a petulant high-schooler shouldn't indicate that the show is troubled. It rules. I just wasn't 100% sold on this episode. Here's why in the form of a recap:
1.) Sayid, still in cage, has a flashback showing him as a boy in Iraq killing a chicken. He's a killer, get it? Then we see him in a flashback with Ben after he got off the island supposedly killing Widmore's men because Ben convinced him to (did anybody else get a Memento vibe? Like Ben was Joe Pantoliono who was probably just having him kill people for fun?). We see Sayid in "present time" in 1977 in a cage still. He refuses to cooperate (because he can't on account of not actually being a "hostile"). Sawyer, who is showing some of his self-motivated issues (he WILL protect his life with Juliet at all costs), tries to convince him to escape at first, but he won't do it. So they take Sayid to the Dharma torture guy: Larry from "The Newhart Show." Hmmm
2.) Sayid gets drugged up and spills all the beans, which makes him sound loony. Now, my friend Ben (again, not the homicidal maniac) thought Sawyer was stupid for just standing there, but I don't know his alternative. All he could do is either let Sayid go or hope things went the way they did: that everyone would think Sayid was nuts. The Dharma gang takes a vote, they want to kill him. Sawyer sheepishly agrees, tries once more to get Sayid free (but he don't want to), then gives up.
3.) Little Ben lights a Dharma van on fire, distracts everyone, springs Sayid free. Sayid then shoots little Ben in the gut. Immediately after proclaiming "You're right about me, I am a killer" he shoots little Ben...IN THE GUT.
Okay, so you can see little happened. Plus, nobody thinks Ben is dead. Yes, this will have some kind of ripple effect and we can begin to see if you CAN change the future or if all of this was already incorporated in Ben's past (my vote is on that one). Jack will probably have to save little Ben (echoing his surgery on Ben in the future). Oh, I forgot to mention Kate is longing for Sawyer although apparently living with Jack?! I can't figure out what she actually feels. Maybe she can't either, but it's time for her to feel strongly one way or the other scriptwise. I think the shock of little Ben getting shot was blunted because we all saw it coming (and it won't stick). So, not a biggie at the end.
The bigger issue for me was Sayid acting dumb. Shoot him in the face. You're a killer. You snap dudes necks. You shoot him in the tummy? Dumb. I like the idea that the island won't let him kill Ben, but I would like to have seen that. He stands over little Ben, goes to pull the trigger and is somehow stopped. That would work. This was dumb. Plus, how the hell is Sayid going to get jumped by the prettier version of Anna Lucia? He's been in that position with a dangerous chick before, how is he going to let his guard down like that. Bullshit. It's just not right. I'm ready to get things moving here. Little bursts of story are okay, but I want to get driving to someplace more exciting.
Next week is going to be "save little Ben" episode. You know it. It will be cut with Ben in 2008, which is good because he's a great actor and should make the episode interesting...but it bears mentioning that we're entering the home stretch of the next-to-last season. It's okay to start heading forward now. So-so episode, I'd go with a C+.
posted by Ryan at
9:54 AM
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