Vultures remember Bruce Lee's juicy corpse

Not liking Bruce Lee is like not liking oxygen. It's like a given, you really don't have a choice in the matter. Some people may say "hey, Ryan, that's really just a guy thing." Well, not so fast my sexist rhetorical question asker. Ladies love them some Bruce Lee, too, as evidenced by the fact that almost all of the ladies I know have actually heard of the guy despite (A) not being a fan of kung fu, (B) never having seen one of his movies, and (C) never having been alive while he was (he died 36 years ago). Anyway, news came this week that his family has once more profited from their DNA by opitioning a three part biopic about the legend. Let me say that again THREE PART biopic. Hominahominahomina (if you could see it right now, my eyes are doing the Tex Avery bug out). The dude lived 32 years, and I'm guessing that years 1-9 can be pretty easily summed up with a montage of potty training. One of the reasons the family members gave for selling the rights (other than the actual one: a desire to have more money) is that there have been "many inaccuracies" about Lee. That's fine and all, but I'm not keen to watch 6+ hours of "fact." Seriously, they have whole cable channels that show that stuff all day long. No, part of what makes Lee interesting is the legend, the myths, and downright impossibilities about the man. Hell, if it were me...well, if it were me I wouldn't make any movies at all, but that's beside the point. If FORCED to make this trilogy, I would spend the first film covering his whole life, the second film blending his film roles into some kind of cool meta-take on his life, and the third film would be totally insane, like animated or something. I just can't see following 32 years of even the most interesting human's life. Sometimes, I wonder about following 32 years of my own.