Friday, April 23, 2010

Friday Blitz 3: Re-escape from New York?

Bite down on something, it's the third part of the Friday Blitz!

HeatVision says that Breck Eisner, who would have been dragged out into the desert never to be heard from again after Sahara were his last name not "Eisner," is finally getting to that remake of Escape from New York everyone wanted. Oh, what's that? Nobody out there wanted that? Not a single person? Hmm, that's interesting. Well, John Carpenter is going to roll over in his grave when he...what's that? John Carpenter is still ALIVE? Man, he was ancient a decade ago! Plus, I thought for sure that he'd offed himself after the Ice Cube and Courtney Love sci-fi movie he made. I mean, the only thing that would be worse than an Ice Cube and Courtney Love sci-fi movie would be A REMAKE OF ESCAPE FROM NEW YORK. There is literally zero chance that they get this right. They'll cast some heartthrob schmo in the lead (I'm thinking they'll offer it to Gerard Butler, but he'll back out and they'll get one of the Twilight boys or Channing Tatum), and they'll try to make it an intentional B-movie and it will just suck. Enjoy memories of movies from your youth, folks, they'll all be dead soon.

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