Wednesday, May 26, 2010

Fine, let's talk about the Megan Fox thing again

I don't like talking about Megan Fox. Why? Well it's like David Cross once said in relation to Evanescence: "I don't like things that suck." Yet because her vacuous insides are covered by fleshy parts that make men "feel like their bodies are smiling" (a line from the brilliant Mystery Team, which you should really go buy right now dammit), everyone is talking about little miss bought-some-jugs. As we already know, she is not starring in Transformers 3. This much is fact. Whether she quit or was fired is the subject of much internet speculation. Ah, the internet, so much potential, so much discussion about Megan Fox. Anyhoodle, the thing got interesting for me when I read a particularly angry story that suggested Fox had simply had it with the abuse heaped on her by Michael Bay. I know, hard to believe that a guy who practically used a camera to goose an actress in Transformers 2 may not know how to treat women. Combine this with a boatload of stories of pretty-young-things who were abused and damaged by the explosion-meister, and you've got me going all Keith Olbermann with my suggestion that Michael Bay is the Worst Person in the World. Now he's about to cast the following hot body as the new generic love interest in Transformers third attempt at ruining modern civilization.
That's Rosie Huntington-Whiteley. She's purty. She's also never acted before a day in her life. Bay cast her apparently based on the commercial he directed that featured her alongside a bunch of other bra-busting beauties. Now, replacing Megan Fox with a model who has never acted does seem relatively fair. What isn't fair is that Bay gets to be a giant robo-douche unchecked just because he can incoherently lens shitty action movies. He participated in creating racist robots in his last film, bullied a bunch of young women around, and is casting based on breast size and that's it. Michael Bay, I hope you get eye herpes.

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