Fearless, Flawless Box Office Predictions

What a long-ass week this was. But let's talk about some positives for this week:

• Jay Cutler hasn't thrown an interception since Sunday
• We've really started building momentum on this blog...we've had some great comments from thoughtful readers and had some nice spikes in readership
• I have not suffered an embolism
• It's now over

I think that's it. At the box office this week, look for more mediocrity to rain down upon us like giant meatballs from the sky.

Here's how I see it, haiku style:

1.) Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs - $28 million

3D flying food
should go over well with kids
should suck for grown ups

2.) Jennifer's Body - $13 million

Not to sound shallow,
if this were silent I'd go.
miss Fox shouldn't speak.

3.) The Informant - $12 million

Matt Damon got fat
because fat equals funny.
Not so sensitive.

4.) I Can Do Bad All By Myself - $11 million

Tyler Perry comes
then just as fast he is gone.
Box office ninja.

5.) Love Happens - $8 million

Aniston is back!
Why is everyone leaving?
Oh, the movie sucks.

WILDCARD - 9 - $5.5 million

I may rent this one.
It could be interesting.
And I am oft bored.

Okay, that's it. I love you all deeply, but I've got to get off this crazy ride for a while. Have a great weekend, if you love me back pray for the Bears and I'll see you Monday.