Old (Dead) Boy

We come here today not to praise the potential Steven Spielberg/Will Smith adaptation of the Manga-turned-movie Old Boy, but to bury it. Latino Review, which is a bad-ass movie site even for gringos, is reporting that the project is deader than my insides after watching a "King of Queens" marathon. Supposedly, this has something to do with contract negotiations, but I'd like to believe that the conversation went a little something like this:

Will Smith: "Steven, I just finished watching Old Boy. We ain't doin' this."
Steven Spielberg: "We can change the ending."
Will Smith: "To what?"
Steven Spielberg: "Everybody hugs with the music swelling and some warm lighting? It turns out everything is okay? We'll add a precocious kid!"
Will Smith: "The only things I really took away from the movie were that cool scene where he beats a bunch of guys with some tools, which I'm down with...maybe we can add a few one liners like 'You got hammered,' and that ending, which I am very, very, very much not down with. I just had to take seven showers in my diamond-encrusted, gold-plated upstairs bathroom."
Steven Spielberg: "What if in our version you get the girl?"
Will Smith: "Ewwwwwwwww. You are not listening, Steven."
Steven Spielberg: "What if we make it a comedy? You know, and play the twist up for laughs."
Will Smith: "I'd make Men in Black III, Bad Boys III, and Hancock 2 before making this sick movie."
Steven Spielberg: "Okay, last pitch: These aliens come down...Will? Will? Somebody get me Nicholas Cage on the phone, he'll do anything."