Werewolves jealous, claim to be as angsty as vampires

In what can only be described as an act of desperation, angst-ridden werewolves jealous of the attention received by the nancy-boys of supernatural horror, the bare-chested vampires, have clung together to demand that The Howling be remade. Together with the Benecio Del Toro film Wolfman and their cameo in the box-office destroying Twilight: New Moon, the hairy-backed honchos are eager to reclaim their once revered place as the bad boys with bite. "First that Underworld crap happened," growled Finneaus T Bone, leader of a pack of werewolves that has been largely out of work since the Twilight craze began, "now we're forced to walk around showing off our abs as eye candy in soft-core porn for tweens...it's humiliating." The National Werewolf Alliance (or NWA) had contemplated remaking other movies but settled on Howling because "People tend to like crap...and that series was crap...I mean, did you see The Howling 5...did you know there was a Howling 5 because there was."