Friday, March 26, 2010

Anger, 3D be thy name

If you've watched any morning news program, you've no doubt seen that theaters are increasing 3D ticket prices as soon as right effin' now. This isn't exactly hard-hitting reporting, but Matt Lauer has to do something with his morning besides listen to Al Roker crack wise and try not to stab Ann Curry. Seriously, Roker, I don't know what Faustian deal brought you into this world, but you aren't funny and any teleprompter monkey can read the weather, and don't even get me started on you, Ann Curry. If my imaginary island where I send annoying people was real, you'd be locked in some sort of brutal deathmatch with Limbaugh and Beck for island supremacy. Anyway, I'm about to rant about 3D for a minute, not because my voice is that much different from the many others who have been ranting about it, but because I'm cheesed off and may as well write it out.

It goes like this: Greedy, greedy, greedy, greedy. Somehow, the powers that be are not content with fleecing the public by making us pay a few dollars more for 3D tickets, despite the fact that the glasses only cost the theaters pennies and the projector (the only thing that they had to really make an investment in) is paid for rather quickly. This isn't about recouping cash, this is about figuring out what the pressure point is for the American people. So long as you plunk down whatever ridiculous price they charge to see Johnny Depp assify himself in 3D, they'll keep raising the price. When every project suddenly was announced to be in 3D, I ignored it for the most part, dismissing it as a fad that would eventually go away (a truth that remains). But the fact that these assholes, these ignorant bastards are going to try to bilk the public out of more and more money just to see if they can has finally broke my will. What happens if people say "it's too expensive to go to the movies" and stop going...for good? I know you don't THINK that will happen, but it might. And even if it doesn't, I know you're not FORCING people to pay these prices, but you may be denying kids a fun experience. No way mom and dad can afford to take 2-3 kids to go see the latest 3D affair if it's going to set them back $100 bucks total. That's just asinine. We're still in a recession, morons. As much as I thought 3D may be a fun way to get audiences to see movies, as much as I thought it could be a fun little addition that may help movies from time to time, the combined movement of almost all productions to 3D and this new "let's grab some more cash" attitude from the theater owners/studios has sent me over the edge.

Stop seeing movies in 3D, people. Stop it right now. If we refuse to plunk down the extra money, we can send a message that we're not lemmings that will just totter in and pay whatever because we think we have to. Stop it. See Clash of the Titans in 2D, like it was originally conceived, and watch as studios freak out. Make this the new policy until they stabilize prices. This is bad business and bad etiquette. I'm not saying I'll NEVER see another 3D movie, especially at free screenings. I just won't be paying for them if I can avoid it at all.

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