Things You Should Buy Me (Volume 44)

Hello, hello! Once more you have found yourself in the presence of my cyber begging, my dropping to my blog knees and begging for free stuff. Obviously, I'm (half) kidding. I don't really (totally) expect you to send me free stuff (yes I do), but those who are interested (do it) should send me an email at film@thereader.com (email me now) to find my address if they were so inclined as to send me things (this means you). I was going to mention that I received something free the other day, but it was a kite promoting the new Zack Snyder owl movie. I can't brag about a kite, people. The items below? Oh, now those are worth talking about.

Here are the things you should buy me this week.

1.) This has nothing to do with movies - This is the craziest, most ridiculous Nerf gun I've ever seen.
LOOK AT IT! I've never been that crazy into Nerf, but are you kidding me, man? That thing is a foam-padded ass kicking. You have to feel like some kind of insane spy person just carrying that thing around your house! You can snipe the neighbor kid who makes the dogs bark all day by playing a game called "run back and forth until the dogs bark a lot" without doing any real damage! This is great. I know it's not technically in any way related to what we do here. I don't care. Me likey.

2.) Ladies, this one's for you - I know I don't do enough for you on this site, gals. I pander to clicks from outside sources by posting attractive pictures of women. I mention my obsession with some of them frequently. I don't do enough to bemoan the sexist position of the film industry and the lack of female representation in the corporate structures therein. But I tell you what, I just found an awesome T-shirt you'll love.
Tell me that's not great. It's classy yet hilarious. Plus, I like that they appear to have given our murderous Dorothy a bit of an ethnic makeover. She's not from Kansas anymore? With all the Oz worship out there, this will get a big laugh for another century or so. Technically, this isn't free stuff you should send ME, but I can guarantee it would go to a deserving lady.

3.) And now one for me - Okay, here's the other Threadless choice of the day.
YEAH! I know! It's so incredibly cool that I just can't stand it. That's the SEUSS Army Knife. Get it?! I thought so.

That's it for this week gang, back at you with more wants next week!

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