Twilight forces me to reevaluate my favorite musicians

You have to give it to Twilight, it is taking the art of sucking to levels that previously had only been achieved by mid-90s rappers and ex-girlfriends. I generally treat any news from the series like close relatives fornicating: I know it's happening, but I'm going to hide from it like my sanity depends on it (because it does). But then Slashfilm.com turned me on to a Rotten Tomatoes article that I swear to God I only glanced at long enough to find the related information I needed (and even that was too long, as I got a peak at what I presume is the "werewolf pack" in the film standing together in shirtless, non-werewolf form, in which they look like they're standing in line for a Banarama reunion or starring in a new ad for "Le Douche," a cologne that smells of flop sweat and desperation). In this article, the following was spoken by Chris Weitz, director of the next installment of the series (and, as such, total asshole): When speaking of who is included in the next soundtrack, Weitz said "The criterion will still always be what's right for the movie at that given moment, but Thom Yorke is interested; we might, if we're very lucky, get Kings of Leon to do something." Wow...just...wow. I just did my "25 things I'd rather do than (fill in the blank)" installment, but allow me to give you my top 5 reactions to this news:

1.) I hereby demote Kings of Leon to Princes of Excrement.
2.) The other members of Radiohead, who collectively weigh 73 pounds soaking wet and must use their combined might to open a jelly jar, are going to beat the shit out of Thom Yorke.
3.) I would like to hereby change the term "selling out" to "Yorke-ing a Leon."
4.) This means 20 million tween girls are going to own the same music I do.
5.) At least I now have a bar to measure disappointment against. "Oh, it's bad, but it isn't Thom Yorke doing Twilight music bad."

I love, deeply love, both Yorke and Leon, so this news is like finding a copy of one of these novels on my wife's side of the bed. This is going to take awhile to get over, people. Happy Monday.