Dear Lord in Heaven, I'm buying the Twilight Soundtrack

In what can only be described as the worst thing that has ever happened to me in my entire life, the track list for the new Twilight movie has been released, and it is....totally awesome? No, that's not sarcasm as much as I wish it was. I know, it hurts so bad I don't know what to do about it. It's as though someone has been reading my mean-spirited commentary on the franchise and decided to feed me my just dessert by making a product that I simply MUST have with the picture of....those people on it. Here's the list.

1. Death Cab For Cutie – Meet Me On The Equinox
2. Band Of Skulls – Friends
3. Thom Yorke- Hearing Damage
4. Lykke Li – Possibility
5. The Killers - A White Demon Love Song
6. Anya Marina – Satellite Heart
7. Muse - I Belong To You (New Moon Remix)
8. Bon Iver and St. Vincent – Rosyln
9. Black Rebel Motorcycle Club - Done All Wrong
10. Hurricane Bells – Monsters
11. Sea Wolf – The Violet Hour
12. Ok Go- Shooting The Moon
13. Grizzly Bear - Slow Life
14. Editors – No Sound But The Wind
15. Alexandre Desplat – New Moon (The Meadow)

AAAARRRRRGGGGGHHH! What the hell?! My favorite non-U2 band (Death Cab) has the first song...THOM YORKE is on there...Muse? Black Rebel Motorcycle Club? What is happening? This is the worst news I've had since hearing "No, Brett Favre can still move all of his appendages." Are you telling me that I share something with the millions of people who swear by this series? At the very least, we have common ground in terms of music? I feel like Darth Vader just told me I was his son. I'm going to go wallow now, but before I go, here's a funny and well-illustrated cartoon that is mocking Twilight...a franchise I'm going to buy merchandise from. Weep for me.

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