Nebraska didn't need more reasons to love Clooney

Having already set hearts a-twitter by setting foot in Omaha, George Clooney really doesn't need to do anything else to secure his place in the hearts of Nebraskans (especially my wife), aside from those few souls who fear his women-wooing powers and inexplicable salt-and-pepper hair (that can't be real, right...that's a special effect...right?). Still, Clooney is doing his best to increase his Husker love by eyeing the lead in The Descendants, which is not the biography of Michael Jackson's kids but rather the next movie from Omaha's own Alexander Payne. This seems like a good fit tonally, as Clooney is at his best between genres (the man can rock a dramedy). So, the Oscar-winning actor may star in a movie written by an Oscar winner from Omaha. What else does the man have to do to win your love, you center-dwelling citizens of the U.S.? Howsabout hold a puppy?

Boom.

Tragically, Clooney's hair color is only possible because he survives on the tears of adorable puppies. So, shortly after that picture was taken, he began to berate the pup. "You have a wrinkly face," said the actor, "and you likely will not find satisfactory love in this lifetime. Also, we're going to cut your nuts off." He did this until it felt enough shame to fuel his perfect hair for another day. Damn you, CLOOOOOONEEEY!