Friday, February 12, 2010

Well...it was nice while it lasted

For a brief while, when Avatar consumed the attention of the world, I kinda sorta forgot all about Twilight. Yeah, I know, it was pretty awesome.
Sure, it would come up when I was discussing how Sony wants to poop all over Spider-man's face by turning his adventures into a Twilight-esque den of angst and preening, but for the most part, Twi-mania had finally slunk back into the shadows (or, more specifically, high school lockers and creepy cat ladies' freezers) where it belongs. Well, that's all changed, as Nikki Finke has confirmed that Breaking Dawn, which is totally batshit crazy, is going to be split into two movies, bringing the total to five worthless, poorly acted movies. Okay, maybe it will only be five poorly acted movies and 4 worthless ones, because if what happens at the end of the books happens at the end of the movies...we're in for a little slice of heaven in the form of some seriously whacked out shenanigans. I would go on about this, but you get the idea, right? Oh, hey here's a thought. Even if they move as fast as possible and kick out these movies supa-dupa fast, we're going to have Eclipse this year and Breaking Dawn Uno and Dos next year at the earliest. That means 7 years will have passed from the first book came out until the last movie hits. That's impressively quick, sure, but all those girls who were 15 when the mania first hit are going to be 22 when the last movie comes out. I wonder if they'll still feel the passion for Edward when they're of legal drinking age. Oh, and I should mention that many of the non-teenaged women who loved the first book when it hit may be dead by the time it is all said and done. Likely having choked to death living alone in their apartment. Sad.

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