Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Orange you glad the next Iron Man villain will be Mandarin?

Get it? Mandarin Oranges? You know what, yesterday was a flaming piece of crap that ended up with me standing in the rain with a Sawz-all chopping down a bent branch that had wedged itself beneath my car tire during a storm, a fact I discovered when my cell phone died after I was left without a charger so I was attempting to use my car charger that pulled energy from my car battery which I had to replace the day previously because it suddenly died. So you're going to have to forgive me if I find mandarin oranges to be a hilarious joke. In the wake of Iron Man 2 doing insane money (which is somehow not receiving applause but questions like "Why didn't it break a box office record?"), we're already talking about the next TWO sequels: Avengers and Iron Man 3. It's worth mentioning that Robert Downey Jr will probably be about 50 by the time Iron Man 3 shoots. That's cool and all, because Harrison Ford was able to make Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull while wearing a colostomy bag. Anyway, not the point. The point is that the villains in Iron Man movies have pretty much sucked. Between whatever the hell the Iron Monger is and a big boobied Mickey Rourke with robo-S&M whips, we haven't really seen Tony Stark meet his match. Supposedly, that's going to change, as Jon Favreau swears we're going to get the Mandarin for the next movie. For those who don't speak fluent geek, the Mandarin is a terrible Chinese stereotype who wields 10 magic rings.
He's the closest thing that Iron Man has to a true nemesis, but he also kind of sucks. The idea has always been to include him in the film series, but in a "real" way. In the first movie, the terrorist cell that captures Tony Stark is "the 10 Rings," with the implication that the movie version of the character would be some kind of terrorist guy. Whether or not he will speak with some kind of horribly racist accent whilst stroking his beard and using his "Oriental magic" remains to be seen. This is the catch 22 of Iron Man's rogues gallery: the ones that aren't totally forgettable are memorable for the wrong reasons. It's also worth noting that there's no guarantee Favreau will be back to direct Stark's next go round, so he may be speaking out of turn. Then again, since multiple reports have it that they've made the first two films in the series without hard-set scripts (mostly improv), they may want to bring the guy who knows how to get these performances out of Downey Jr back.

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Blogger David DeMarco said...

"For those who don't speak fluent geek, the Mandarin is a terrible Chinese stereotype who wields 10 magic rings."

*Nerd voice* I'll have you know *snort* that the supposed, 'magic rings' you claim the Mandarin wears are not magic at all, they are, in fact, components from an advanced alien spaceship's star drive that had crashed centuries ago, which the Mandarin discovered and converted to his own nefarious purposes.

May 11, 2010  

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