Friday, July 23, 2010

Fearless, Flawless Box Office Predictions

As you know by now, I'm praying with every fiber of faith that Inception will retain its hold over humanity and continue pummeling the box office like a prize fighter in his prime. Help the film do that. See it if you haven't and see it again if you have. That's an order soldier. I'll be back later with a review of Salt, but the basics of that are this: If you wanna see it, that's cool. You'll think it's okay. It is. It's not great, but it's okay enough. That's my in-depth analysis at this point, it's all I have to give on this Friday. Now, quickly, to the haikus before I tire completely.

1.) Inception - $40 million

I know this is high,
but so are my hopes and my dreams.
Make this a huge hit!!!!

2.) Salt - $30 million

Angie kicks some ass,
but let's just be honest here,
hers is too skinny.

3.) Despicable Me - $18 million

Still the best option
for families that have seen
Toy Story enough.

4.) Ramona and Beezus - $8 million

I remember this!
I read some Ramona books!
I'm still a tough guy!!!!

5.) The Sorcerer's Apprentice - $8 million

Poor Nicholas Cage
dressing up like he did here,
only for a flop.

WILDCARD: Toy Story 3 - $7.5 million

All things someday end.
This is the end of the road
for a great movie!

Okay, that's it for now. Back with a review later. Must run!

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