Friday, July 30, 2010

Fearless, Flawless Box Office Predictions

Hey beautiful blog puppeteers. You really pull my strings, you know that? I've crossed my needed payment threshold early because of you sweet, sweet ad clicking nuggets of joy. Combine that with this being a Friday, a payday Friday at that, and the fact that it's poised to be a very productive finish to the week for me, and you get the rarest of all sightings: A Ryan Syrek good mood. Howsabout them apples? Oh, sure, I'm tired, but I'm also about to predict that Inception will hold over for the third week as number one. I don't think I have ever been more proud of the American movie-going public as I have been these past few weeks. You're talking about Inception, analyzing it, recommending it, seeing it twice...and it's paying off. I promise you that right now, between this and District 9, studios are suddenly looking for the right combination of artistry and originality instead of only looking for remakes. Oh, they'll still do those like crazy, but this really has ushered in a huge change I think. I love you all so much. I'm about to make some predictions and then peace out on y'all since it's Friday and you have better things to do.

Here are the haikus for this week:

1.) Inception - $28 million

This has brought me joy.
Box office domination
is finally sweet.

2.) Dinner for Schmucks - $25 million

I love you, Paul Rudd.
And I don't care who knows it.
No one tell Abbie.

3.) Salt - $18 million

This should hold quite well.
I should say it will "preserve."
Tell me you get that.

4.) Cats and Dogs: The Revenge of Kitty Galore - $17 million

This isn't real, right?
I am imagining this.
This should not exist.

5.) Despicable Me - $15 million

Despicable what?
This thing just keeps making cash.
Have respect for that.

WILDCARD - Charlie St. Cloud - $15 million

Dead kids are freaky.
They are almost as creepy
as pale Zack Efron.

Okay, that's it gang, have a slam-bang weekend for me, okay?

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