Friday Free-For-All
Step-Brothers will satisfy your Will Ferrell scrotum curiosity
Look for my full review in Thursday's edition of The Reader, but here's a quick suggestion for those thinking about seeing Step-Brothers: Don't. Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly, who were actually funny together in Talladega Nights, prove that too much of a good thing can make you want to die inside. Director Adam McKay refuses to reign in the improvising, which means scenes that would be amusing for a minute are stretched into 10 minutes of comedy-free discomfort. Moreover, with absolutely no plot, no likable characters, no technical moviemaking skills and way, way, way too much of Ferrell's breeding bag, the whole thing feels like a homemade movie crafted by two kids who just learned how to curse. It's more amusing than Semi-Pro, but so are most war crime tribunals. I don't want to settle on an official grade for the movie yet, but something tells me that the first few letters of the alphabet can go ahead and take the weekend off.
Weekend battle plan - Have you heard about this Dark Knight movie?
In an effort to try new things, we'll try to post suggestions for weekend film consumption every Friday based on things we've already seen. What I'm saying is, two people shouldn't have to see X-Files: I Want to Believe.
In theaters - Yeah, chances are you'll either see Batman again or for the first time if the line of nerds dressed in leather and clown paint scared you away last weekend. Oh, and just so you know, if anyone shows up dressed in murder-clown face paint this weekend, it isn't for the Batman premiere and you have full permission to call the authorities. That said, if you aren't going to see or re-see The Bat, avoid Step-Brothers and X-Files. Give Hellboy 2 some more love, it really deserves it. You won't find a more visually entertaining film all summer (yeah, Batman's pretty but Hellboy is pretty to look at without making you want to pee with fear). Oh, and your mom will go ga-ga for Mamma Mia! So earn some brownie points with that.
To recap: See The Dark Knight, Hellboy 2 and Mamma Mia! and avoid Step-Brothers and X-Files.
On DVD: Rent or buy Spaced, the funniest British thing on television since the Margaret Thatcher Wacky Fun-Time Hour. Also, 21 isn't bad, but you can do better.
Fearless, Flawless Box Office Predictions
Another weekly offering will see me taking a stab at weekend totals for the top 5 flicks. If I'm right, I win a pony. If I'm wrong, the pony dies. No pressure.
1. The Dark Knight - $75 million
A 50% drop would be incredible, but I think it could do even better. I wouldn't be surprised if it did in the neighborhood of 80-90 million, but I'm a Spider-man fan, so I won't give Batman the satisfaction of that prediction. This flick has an outside (and I do mean outside) chance at beating Titanic's $600 million tally. After this weekend, it should be over $300 million with very little competition in the coming months to challenge it. If the heat doesn't burn off too fast, it could become at least the second-highest grosser ever (right now that's Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope with $435 million). It's outpacing Pirates of the Caribbean 2 by nearly $40 million at this point, notable because that film ended up past $415 million and is the 6th highest grossing film of all time. What I'm trying to say is, Warner Brothers is raking in so much money, they can actually afford to gas up the batmobile.
2. Step-Brothers - $25 million
I warned you. Just remember that. I warned you.
3. Mamma Mia! - $17 million
Meryl Streep is an unstoppable juggernaut who will scissor-kick you in the face if you don't take your mom to see this movie. In the name of ABBA, this film will continue to rake in the dough.
4. X-Files: I Want to Believe - $15 million
I want things too, X-Files, but we don't always get our way. Turns out, making a movie based on a TV show that's been off the air for the decade isn't a safe financial bet.
5. Journey to the Center of the Earth - $7 million
It was a fight between Hancock and Journey to see who grabbed the fifth spot. I couldn't bring myself to care, so I picked the one that didn't feature a head-in-the-ass joke.
That's all for this week gang, see you next week for more shenanigans and tomfoolery.
Look for my full review in Thursday's edition of The Reader, but here's a quick suggestion for those thinking about seeing Step-Brothers: Don't. Will Ferrell and John C. Reilly, who were actually funny together in Talladega Nights, prove that too much of a good thing can make you want to die inside. Director Adam McKay refuses to reign in the improvising, which means scenes that would be amusing for a minute are stretched into 10 minutes of comedy-free discomfort. Moreover, with absolutely no plot, no likable characters, no technical moviemaking skills and way, way, way too much of Ferrell's breeding bag, the whole thing feels like a homemade movie crafted by two kids who just learned how to curse. It's more amusing than Semi-Pro, but so are most war crime tribunals. I don't want to settle on an official grade for the movie yet, but something tells me that the first few letters of the alphabet can go ahead and take the weekend off.
Weekend battle plan - Have you heard about this Dark Knight movie?
In an effort to try new things, we'll try to post suggestions for weekend film consumption every Friday based on things we've already seen. What I'm saying is, two people shouldn't have to see X-Files: I Want to Believe.
In theaters - Yeah, chances are you'll either see Batman again or for the first time if the line of nerds dressed in leather and clown paint scared you away last weekend. Oh, and just so you know, if anyone shows up dressed in murder-clown face paint this weekend, it isn't for the Batman premiere and you have full permission to call the authorities. That said, if you aren't going to see or re-see The Bat, avoid Step-Brothers and X-Files. Give Hellboy 2 some more love, it really deserves it. You won't find a more visually entertaining film all summer (yeah, Batman's pretty but Hellboy is pretty to look at without making you want to pee with fear). Oh, and your mom will go ga-ga for Mamma Mia! So earn some brownie points with that.
To recap: See The Dark Knight, Hellboy 2 and Mamma Mia! and avoid Step-Brothers and X-Files.
On DVD: Rent or buy Spaced, the funniest British thing on television since the Margaret Thatcher Wacky Fun-Time Hour. Also, 21 isn't bad, but you can do better.
Fearless, Flawless Box Office Predictions
Another weekly offering will see me taking a stab at weekend totals for the top 5 flicks. If I'm right, I win a pony. If I'm wrong, the pony dies. No pressure.
1. The Dark Knight - $75 million
A 50% drop would be incredible, but I think it could do even better. I wouldn't be surprised if it did in the neighborhood of 80-90 million, but I'm a Spider-man fan, so I won't give Batman the satisfaction of that prediction. This flick has an outside (and I do mean outside) chance at beating Titanic's $600 million tally. After this weekend, it should be over $300 million with very little competition in the coming months to challenge it. If the heat doesn't burn off too fast, it could become at least the second-highest grosser ever (right now that's Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope with $435 million). It's outpacing Pirates of the Caribbean 2 by nearly $40 million at this point, notable because that film ended up past $415 million and is the 6th highest grossing film of all time. What I'm trying to say is, Warner Brothers is raking in so much money, they can actually afford to gas up the batmobile.
2. Step-Brothers - $25 million
I warned you. Just remember that. I warned you.
3. Mamma Mia! - $17 million
Meryl Streep is an unstoppable juggernaut who will scissor-kick you in the face if you don't take your mom to see this movie. In the name of ABBA, this film will continue to rake in the dough.
4. X-Files: I Want to Believe - $15 million
I want things too, X-Files, but we don't always get our way. Turns out, making a movie based on a TV show that's been off the air for the decade isn't a safe financial bet.
5. Journey to the Center of the Earth - $7 million
It was a fight between Hancock and Journey to see who grabbed the fifth spot. I couldn't bring myself to care, so I picked the one that didn't feature a head-in-the-ass joke.
That's all for this week gang, see you next week for more shenanigans and tomfoolery.
Labels: Batman, Box office predictions, John C Reilly, Meryl Streep, Step-Brothers, Stepbrothers, The Dark Knight, Will Ferrell
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