Friday, October 29, 2010

Fearless, Flawless Box Office Predictions

I'm just going to get right to it because I really don't have that many deep thoughts this weekend. One crappy new movie comes out, that will be number one. Other than that, you enjoy the last nice weekend of weather, have yourself some trick-or-treating shenanigans, and generally frolic and be merry. K?

Here's the box office prediction haikus all the kids love these days.

1.) Saw 3D - $26 million

This is the sixth Saw.
So why not call it Saw 6?
Those guys can't count good.

2.) Paranormal Activity 2 - $20 million

Look! Now you see it,
now you don't...or now you won't.
In which case, nice call.

3.) Jackass 3D - $9 million

One day, we'll look back
and we'll ask why everything
was in damn 3D.

4.) Red - $9 million

Old people need love,
or at least movies to see.
That explains this one.

5.) Hereafter - $8 million

This one is scary.
Not in terms of on-screen stuff,
just scary boring.

WILDCARD - The Social Network - $6 million

Soon this will be gone,
but it's legacy remains!
See you Oscar night!

That's it. You have a blast this weekend. Figuratively, no more explosives for you.

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