Monday, February 22, 2010

Weekend Box Office Wrap Up: Don't F**k with Marty Scorsese

You can move his movie around on the schedule. You can mock him for pairing up AGAIN with Leondardo DiCaprio, his floppy-haired, 12-year-old-boy looking muse. You can wonder why the hell he's doing a run-of-the-mill thriller and not something more Oscar-worthy. But you cannot stop Martin Scorsese from dominating the box office, overpowering critics, and generally kicking mucho ass. His eyebrows alone give him the power to dismiss naysayers. He is a cinematic ninja, and he just KI-YAed the box office. All hail Scorsese. All hail him NOW.

Here's how the weekend went, haiku style:

1.) Shutter Island - $40 million (Accuracy of prediction - 94%)

His mojo is strong.
His eyebrows are stronger still.
Scorsese is GOD.

2.) Valentine's Day - $17 million (Accuracy of prediction - 79.5%)

What a HUGE drop off!
Nearly 70%!
Justice is now served.

3.) Avatar - $16 million (Accuracy of prediction - 90%)

How is this at 3?
It should be going down now!
Go the OTHER way!!!

4.) Percy Jackson & The Olympians: The Lightning Thief - $15 million (Accuracy of prediction - 83.5%)

It's a tweener flick.
Not a home run or a flop.
Will sequels happen?

5.) The Wolfman - $10 million (Accuracy of prediction - 90%)

Avatar won't leave
But this barely stays a week.
There is no justice.

Overall accuracy of prediction - 84%

Another "B" week.
Is that good enough for me?
Is it good for you?

Alright, that's it. Go be productive on this Monday.

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