Fearless, Flawless Box Office Predictions

You know, even though I was busy scampering around the countryside of Decatur, Nebraska last Friday, gathering wood to help heat my father-in-law's house (yep, for real), my heart was wondering what my haikus might have looked like for the week. I pondered whether people were sitting in front of their computers, crying and gnashing their teeth, begging for some glimpse into the future, demanding pithy comments about whether or not Twilight would continue it's domination. That daydreaming ended when I dropped a giant log on my knee. It hurt less than watching Twilight (zing!).

Here are this week's predictions (haiku style, yo):

1.) The Blind Side - $21 million

Sandra's biggest yet!
We all know the real hero:
Mr. Tim McGraw.

2.) Twilight: New Moon - $18 million

Let's face some facts, gang.
Nobody cares what I think,
with money like this.

3.) Armored - $10 million

I will not see this.
But armadillo jokes rule.
Get it? It's "armored."

4.) 2012 - $8 million

The world ends like this.
Not as is seen IN the film,
but because of it.

5.) Old Dogs - $7.5 million

Best. Review. Ever.
Quote: If this was a person,
then I would stab it.

WILDCARD - Brothers - $7 million

Oh, no, Natalie.
I love you so much, but...why?
Why did you do this?

Okay gang, that's it. Enjoy holiday shopping madness and maybe a little sleep mixed in (not for me, but you know, maybe for you).